Looking Back

Luke 9:62 

⁶² Jesus said to him, “No one who puts his hand to the plow and looks back is fit for the kingdom of God.”

As we prepare this week to graduate our youngest son I spent a little time looking in the mirror one afternoon. I began to think about all our family had accomplished, all the struggles we never would have made it through without Jesus. “Except for the Grace of God.” How true that is. That’s when I noticed them. The deep crevices on the side of my face.

These weren’t wrinkle lines, more like valleys, or as we say here in the south, “hollers”. I began to notice the extra weight my face now carries. Smiling shows more cheeks these days than mouth. The more I looked the less I was smiling. I found myself missing the young me. The cocky guy who used to glance in the mirror with no wrinkles, all his hair, and a face that seemed half as wide. I found myself missing my youth.

That’s when it hit me. Whether it was this verse God brought to mind, or just His Spirit I have no idea. I was reminded that I look the way I do because of all the struggles and challenges God had brought me through as a father raising four sons. I was reminded that even before I fell ill I no longer took time to run, and forget about the weights or swimming. The things I did in high school and college, the things I had time to do, I had not had time to do for years. The body I saw before me wasn’t just one that had changed because of age, or this rare disease. This body represents 28 years of hard work.

It represents late nights with babies, late nights working so we could feed the babies, and especially the teenagers in later years. It represents successes, failures, great decisions, failed ideas, and so many other events over the last 50 years.

Now don’t get me wrong, there is nothing wrong with working to be healthy. We should all want to live our lives as healthy as we possibly can. Sitting around and eating bacon all day is not the road to success. However, trying to hold on to our youth isn’t either. It’s okay if you lose some hair….or a lot of hair. It’s okay if the hair you have is gray. Be proud of those wrinkles, it shows a life that has been filled with struggles good and bad, and hopefully much wisdom on the back side of those moments.

Jesus wants us looking forward because He is transforming us in this life for eternity with Him. As we take moments to look back, we need to remember that who we are today isn’t who was were back then, and we don’t want to be that person. Smile at your scars, inside and out. It shows God has delivered you through many things, and has qualified you to help those who struggle now.